Why I don't take resolutions on January 1st

No Idea Whatsoever About What Hygge Is?

Don’t worry. I got your back. 😉

If you’re already a Hygge fan, just skip this part and start enjoying today’s blog post.

Still with me?

Ok.. awesome. Time to have fun.

What’s Hygge?

It’s a feeling you can’t buy of safety, warmth, peace, calm, contentment, and everything in between.

Based on cosiness, togetherness, and uniqueness, it’s a whole guide to craft a cosiness-based way of life for you AND your family.

To me, Hygge is like a roadmap to enjoy simple pleasure, slow down, unplug, and eventually becoming unapologetically yourself.

How can I learn more about it?

1/ Read the reviews I made at  How The Hygge Book helps me to love my own quirks

2/ Request a special invitation for #TheHyggeLounge at https://www.thehyggeplanner.com/newsletter

3/ Buy Meik Weiking’s book by clicking here (Where you’re buying from this link Amazon will give a percentage to WWF on your behalf. I’m not owning a penny nor a compensation by any means) 

How do you pronounce it?

Truth is, no one cares how you pronounce it as long as you can experience it day in and day out.

That said, it’s commonly admitted to be [HOO-GA] .

Keep it simple and don’t over complicate the process.

If you don’t get it the first time, no big deal.

Is there a Hygge lifestyle?

YES!! and I mean absolutely without the shadow of a doubt.

Hygge is more than just a list of things to do or have. It’s NOT a decor (see below for more infos).

If you’re quiet/ introvert, chances are you’re already living a Hygge lifestyle without even knowing it. Now, you can model what you’re already good at to enjoy that cosy, comfy, and homey feelings 24/7.

If you’re totally new and you’d love to implement that simple, decluttered, down to earth, eco friendly, and comfy way of living for your family, that’s totally doable.

Truth it, it’s WHY I created this entire site: to provide you the tools, the resources, and the inspiration to turn your life into a cosiness-based living without adding stress. (To get a weekly dose of cosiness-based pep talk, join #TheHyggeLounge HERE )

Where does it come from?

Hygge comes from Denmark (but the word itself comes for Norway). At some point in history, Norway and Denmark were one kingdom only.

For the records:

  the first mention of Hygge is circa 1840 (which means Hygge is everything but a fad trends)

– Denmark is ranking on the top 3 of the happiest countries in the world every singe year!

– the tax level in Denmark is one of the highest in the world. Yet, the citizens ARE full of happiness.

—> Who doesn’t want to model what the happiest people in the world are doing to be happy, content, and joyful day in and day out?  I know I do (so does my Great Grand Mother in her journals)

Is Hygge only a decor for Fall & Winter?

This is a common myth I HAVE to bust once and for all. Danish people don’t stop living 6 months of the year. They enjoy and practice Hygge ALL YEAR LONG.

They just adapt what they do and how they do it. It’s definitely easier to have a snow day in winter and it’s definitely easier to have a BBQ outside in the middle of Summer.

Hygge is not stuck in Fall & Winter nor is a home decor.

If you want a decor, ask a professional to set up a stage… You won’t feel better in a snap because you have a fireplace and tonnes of fairy lights.

If it was that simple, everyone would be happy and medication wouldn’t be needed to avoid anxiety.

(If you’re under medication, NEVER EVER stop without a professional help. Asking for help should be your #1 priority. There’s no shame nor guilt to seek for a better health, or a better mental clarity)

You don’t have to spend $$$ to revamp your living room so it looks like a country living magazine cover… and you can show off on Instagram. Hygge is NOT a popularity contest. There’s no mandatory list of items to buy.

You can live Hygge in a moroccan house, a contemporary penthouse, a cottage close to the sea, a tiny house, a small apartment that looks like a boudoir, or a fancy super modern house. Hygge is what you made out of it.

Eh… you’re done with the introduction.

If you want to dive deeper:

– request your invitation for #TheHyggeLounge HERE

– check our workbook to craft a cosiness-based way of life for your family in 7 days HERE

– download our 108 Done for You ideas to practice Hygge as a family (when you have no time for brainstorm) HERE

WARNING: Resolution Reset is  NOW Restful Routine. Get your Mini Course at https://checkout.chec.io/RestfulRoutine  

Welcome to our first 2018 Coffee Talk!

Before we dive into today’s topic (and it’s a big one), I’d like to wish you a marvelous year for 2018. Not the typical wishes that pop everywhere… Instead, I’d like you to stand up for what matters to you, for your values, for embracing who you are (as you are NOW not as you’d like to be in ten months from now). May this year be your aha moment to dare living the hyggelig life you want, the way you want. 

Today’s post is all about debunking a common myth we face each and every year. It makes me cringe each time and I, finally, took the time to write about it.

No only it is overwhelming to rely on January 1st, but also it’s very judgmental…. Let me explain what I mean by that right after you’ve taken a good cup of coffee (or tea or rooibos or hot cocoa <— don’t launch me on chocolate).

 

Why taking resolutions on January will lead you to failure

 

As most of you know, I’m not a native English speaker. In plain English, it means that I’ve got a dictionary close to me all day long (ok… sometimes even at night but it’s another story).

 

When I was brainstorming for this challenge, I really wanted to find something powerful AND appealing. The most common word seemed to be RESOLUTION. I grabbed my lovely dictionary and I read: “from the verb to resolve. Settle or find a solution to (a problem or contentious matter)”

 

Basically, you only take a resolution when you’ve got a problem:

  • you’re too old, too thin, too bright, too kind
  • you’re smocking, you’re overweight,
  • you’re not minimalist, you’re not a Princess, you hate pink
  • you can’t stand x, y, z…

—> We can sum it up by “when you don’t fit into the societal mould, you have a problem and you have to fix it” That’s very judgemental isn’it?

 

Unless you have health issue, no one has the right to tell you what’s acceptable or not for your life.  That societal pressure to live a “perfect” life with a lovely home, a spouse/husband, 2.3 kids, a dog/cat, taking 4.7 weeks of holidays and smiling all day long is just a HOAX.  

 

Surprisingly enough, the entire planet seems to get a wake up call when a new year is beginning… just as if something would be different on January, 1st.

Is it in the air?

in the water?

on the calendar?

Would you really be different when you hit January 1st?

NOT at all, but it’s reassuring to get into a collective idea that “if we all begin at this date, we’ll make through days in and days out”.

Pardon my French, it’s just another marketing trick to sell you more planners, more so-called methods to quit smoking, to lose 5 pounds, to get x,y or z….

 

The best moment to jump into something new is NOW: you’ll never get ready. No need to wait until the sun will be pink or the stars will answer your questions in italian… Something will be missing, someone will not understand your choice… Who cares?? I hope you’re not.

 

January, 1st is everything but a magical day where every wish becomes automatically reality in a snap.

 

Our mind knows it (it’s so hard to trick it by the way)… and you have only two choices: you level up/decrease expectations to fit in OR you quit.

 

But, each time you decide to quit, you’re labelled as a loser. Someone who doesn’t have the strength to endure the pressure. —> Hello, low self esteem!! We were not supposed to seen each other today though! Your inner confidence drops to the abyss and you may feel as an overall failure just because you’ve decided NOT to follow everyone’s path.

 

The truth is: by quitting, by refusing to adapt your life into something that doesn’t fit your needs, you are showing up your courage, your tenacity, your respect for yourself. Each time you’re trying to fix something that’s not broken (= takin a resolution), you’re leading yourself to failure because 99% of the time, you do NOT need to fix it at all.

Ok…you’re nice Ophelie but what about Goals?

I assume you’re not talking about the sport…

Let’s dive into that odd category.

For the vast majority of Human, each word refers to an image or, at least, a memory. Goals is not a different. When you hear it, you may think about:

-project,

– corporate,

– obligations,

– mandatory tasks

– accountability (not always a good option if you’re quiet or introvert)

Goals appear to be something imposed by others. They rarely come from within and the chance you’ll forget about them is easy to understand. You’re not attached to them as you should (they don’t have that special twist to keep you moving).

 

Do you mean that I’m an Impostor?

No way!!! When we don’t feel as we’re supposed to (or told to), we often wrap everything under the FEAR blanket.:

  • Fear of failure
  • Fear of success (I’m very good at this one… Hello self sabotage)
  • Fear of rejection
  • Fear of abandon
  • Fear of changing
  • Impostor syndrome (like “who the heck I am to think outside the box?”)
  • All in one personality (the type “you miss the tiny boat on x so you’re a whole failure human)

 

NONE of these are TRUE.

 

This fear may come from the ones you cherish the most (like family & friends) or people at work. You’re having a small talk with someone you care and, out of the blue, he/she tells something that deeply hurts you… Here comes the conflict, you’re hurt but it’s from someone who “loves” you… so, (s)he may tell that just to help me…support me… Maybe, I was wrong….Maybe, I should reframe my idea… Maybe, it’s not the best moment… Maybe, you should turn your back and run away as quick as possible.  

 

It’s possible to learn how to manage fear, but, when fear turns into doubt… you’re screwed. It takes ages to get rid of self doubt. It’s insidious and kind of vicious… It goes everywhere and in every part of your brain. In fact, I tend to say that FEAR is a Funny Event with Amazing Rewards.

Why I don't take resolutions on January 1st

Maybe, it’s time for a Divine help though?

Call it the way you want: meditation, Law of Attraction, yogalites, mindfulness, cells cleansing, worship: it may be a tremendous support for your mindset but you HAVE to take actions every single day if you want to evolve, grow, change…

I really don’t want to be disrespectful (and, YES, I know Hygge is NOT about religion). Yet, the truth the matter is: spirituality and faith may have a huge part in your daily life. If it’s the case, good for you. If not, perfect. 

Despite all the respect I have for spiritual people, I highly doubt that praying for peace and children to be fed will magically lead to food abundance if you don’t take actions in real life (sadly).

Do NOT underestimate your worth based on who you are or what you love.

Play with what you have and then, you’ll get more “cards” to play with.

Ground yourself on what matters to you.

What should I do instead of all that?

TAKING DECISIONS: a conscious, well crafted choice to modify something in your environment/ life for the better.

When we’re lucky enough to get our basic needs in place (food, water, a roof and some form of love), Human is naturally tempted to grow, to evolve, to get better at something, to quit what’s not healthy, to dive into a passion.

This is what decisions are about: doing what need to be done in your life with NO cookie cutter approach. I’ll give you the steps to do that in the workbook for today.

For now, bear in mind 3 ideas:

  • Be strategic: Don’t overwhelmed yourself with dozens of decisions. Pick up up to 3 for the entire year (You’ll have plenty of time to adjust or add more along the way)
  • Be wise: confront your biggest needs/ fears first. No one knows you better than you. For me: learning to love myself is a huggggeee fear. I’m now ready to embrace that fear to get my Amazing Rewards
  • Be healthy selfish: your needs, your well being depends primarily on you. No matter how much you’re loved/ adored. You’re responsible for crafting the life you want.

As I’m writing that course, I’m listening for the 100 times the same song from Linkin Park called “Breaking the Habit”. Despite the fact that this band is famous, amazingly good and loved by millions of people, the lead vocal Chester Bennington committed a suicide in 2017. Our outside “happiness” has nothing to deal with how we feel inside, so please, be selfish. Protect your own definition of happiness.

Why I don't take resolutions on January 1st

It’s time to wrap up! TLTR: Resolutions on January= Big NO-NO

I’m aware that this blog post may be controversial. Yet, I’m a huge advocate of telling the truth not with the goal to hurt someone but to ignite the inner strength that lies within each of us. 

You don’t have to follow the fad trends to feel alive or more human. Create your own path, follow your intuition, use the tools you need (Hygge is just a tool, a powerful one but just a tool to move on on your own journey).

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